Short jokes
Why did the liberal cross the road?
(Ah, fuck this shit, I'm gonna kill myself!)
Where do rape victims live?
In kennels.
Q: What did Jesus say when he got nailed to the cross?
A: Owwww!!!!!
What is a big animal 🦓? A bat 🦇!
I lent my sister my bed. The next morning, she told me it worked like a dream.
I live in a world made of cheese. Someone stubbed their toe and screamed, "Cheese-its, Christ!"
"Peppa's ribs."
I want to do Uranus. (tounge emoji) (wet emoji)
A man came running into a hospital saying, "Doctor, Doctor! I can't feel my legs!"
The doctor replied, "I know I amputated your arms!"
Two tomatoes are walking on a road. Then a car runs over one of them, and the other says: "Hi, ketchup!"
What was the last thing that went through the minds of the 9/11 jumpers?
Their ankles.
Lololol get it? They fell from like 100 feet.
I molested a child today, and it felt quite lovely on my penis! 👍
What’s the difference between anal sex and vegetables? One is cruel to the person getting it in, the other is vegetables.
Why were the octopi sad?
Ugly 2d big tittied girls kept fucking him idk im a horny 14 year old.
You were amazing... Sike I lied, that pussy is dry.
Me: Hey, I have candy.
Kid: Right next to me, can I have some?
Me: Some of deez nuts.
Are you a bullet?
*gets shot*
Penis, neck, rope?
Why don’t you peel a banana?
It’s too hard to kill your nana.
"1v1 me bitch!"