Short jokes
Did you hear about the new Chinese food?
It is called: “Wuhan Fried Bats”!
I broke up with my ex girlfriend. Here's her number.
Sike, that's the wrong number!
ooooooooooooooooooooo
What's harder than taking a shit?
Trying to take a shit while constipated!
What kind of knight puts dumb jokes on the internet?
You!
Today; worst day ever.
My annoying sibling got hit by a train, and I lost my job as a conductor.
Why does Trump build a wall?
There’s such a thing as a ladder.
French fries don't come from France; they come from Greece.
Q. What do you get if you put hot water down a rabbit hole?
A. Hot cross bunnies!
The lettuce and tomato were in a race. The lettuce was a head and the tomato was trying to ketchup.
I'm straighter than a rainbow.
What was the epileptic chef’s house special?
Seizure salad.
I like my women like I like my eggs.
Beaten against a table until her insides come out.
Why is Uranus so big? Because you discovered it.
I bet you love prostate exams because you live things up your ass.
Q: Name a murderer?
A: Jews: Hitler. Russians: Stalin. Chinese: Mao. Americans: Bin Laden. Aborted fetus: My mom.
What is the useless skin around the vagina called?
The woman.
What do most disabled people eat?
Their arm.
My friends.
The earth is flat.
What’s red, nine inches long, and makes my girlfriend cry every time she sees it?
Her abortion.