Short jokes
I left my Avatar at home today.
I never get off on the wrong foot.
How did Helen Keller dance? Very Bad.
How did Helen Keller draw? With her hand.
If ignorance is bliss, you must be the happiest person on the planet.
If blind people could play go-kart, it very quickly turns into bumper cars.
Why couldn't people have their phone on airplane mode during 9/11?
Because their phone exploded the towers.
What’s the most terrifying word in nuclear physics?
Oops!
Wife: “How do I look?” Husband: “With your eyes.”
My girlfriend broke up with me because I quote Linkin Park too much.
But in the end, it doesn’t even matter.
Bro has to get a fringe to cover up the big, increasing hairline.
Hi sisisissisisisisisis.
What did the tree say to the depressed kid?
"Stop hanging around."
What do they call Dwayne "the Rock" Johnson's son? The Pebble.
Texter 1: You know People treat me like a god.
Texter 2: How?
Texter 1: They ignore my existence unless they need something.
What's 2ft long, blue, and stiff and keeps a woman up all night?
Cot death.
My uncle is a horrible ventriloquist. He put his hand up my butt, but he told me NOT to say anything.
can someone please tell what happened?
I was playing hide-n-seek with my dad and he hid, but I could never find him till this day.
Why did the African child wake up suddenly? Because he was being sexually abused.
Why did the suicide bomber get promoted?
Because he was blowing up at work. 💀😈