Short jokes
What's the difference between Vikkstar and a tree?
Nothing. They're both hollow on the inside and brown on the outside.
Today at the bank, an old lady asked me to help check her balance. So I pushed her over.
Why do people always talk about 9/11, but seriously, just let it sit there, like the rubble it is.
Why did Sally's pizza get cold? Because she has no arms.
We have life. I hope we have life. We have God in Jesus Christ. This is a good thing. It is a song part.
Dang, it got ketchup on my sleeve. What do I do?
Spread the love!
He's in a wheelchair.
What is it called when a gay guy punches someone?
Fruit punch.
NONCE
Have you ever met a knight with a metanite at night?
How do you stop a bull from charging? Cancel its credit card.
Where do you go if you lost a pencil?
Office Works! They have solved loads of pencil cases.
What’s the difference between a mushroom and a tree?
One's a fucking tree.
What do you call a deer with no eyes?
No-eye-deer (no idea).
What job lets you kill the most people?
An abortion doctor.
Daddy bear said, "Somebody's been sleeping in my bed!"
Mummy bear said, "It was probably your whore, Linda!"
Why was Stephen Hawking late to the NASA meeting?
He couldn't get up the kerb.
Lettuce ketchup.
What’s the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?
The wheelchair.
Why is a tree brown?
If you are thinking about this, you are racist.