Short jokes
Don't crack this joke up!
Why do golfers bring a spare pair of socks?
In case they get a hole in one.
A 7-foot-tall man walks into a restaurant with his 4-foot-tall girlfriend, and the maitre d' says to the waiter, “He must be nuts over her.”
One tonsil said to the other tonsil, “We must be in San Juan Capistrano, here comes another swallow.”
Why is it painful to have your attorney with you in the hospital?
The damages are severe.
Why can't homeless people buy a house?
'Cause they live on the streets.
What are the similarities of an orphan and a water fountain?
They both sprout water.
Guy on Fortnite: "Ima sleep with your mom lmao."
Orphan: Starts crying.
Peanuts are hard to crack, just like my ex-wife's heart.
Yo mama so fat the last time I saw 90210 was when she stepped on the scale.
Lucky for me I'm only 210.
I have a friend who doesn't have a dad.
He says: "You're useless, go to hell!"
Me: "Wait, why do you want me to join your dad?"
Why did the baby cow cross the road?
To find its mom who has the milk.
If I fantasize about fucking a UCP Cabinet Minister,
Does that mean I'm sexually Conservative?
Why don't churches have Wi-Fi? Because they can't compete with an invisible force that actually works.
Nutty.
Why don’t babies pollinate flowers?
God chose Plan B.
You say this to your friend, "Damn, your nuts are bigger than mine!" *thinks the wrong way*.
Friend: I must order more nuts.
Why did the Irishman use three condoms? To be sure, to be sure, to be sure!
RTG iceberg?
EHO?