Short jokes
What were the orphan's mom and dad's names? John and Jane Doe.
Clowns were doing an egg contest, and one clown had their egg crack, and another clown said, "The yoke's on you!"
"MERCURY INSURANCE, come to our office in Mercury."
Why can you trust a donut? It tells the hole truth!
What's green and sticky?
... A stick.
Is your tap water running well?
Beta, go catch it!
Best chick ever.
Call me at 6969696969.
I went to the table to eat my egg, but I couldn't find it anywhere.
I think someone must've poached it.
Roses are red, That's a tin can, You have no home, So get in the van!
Why did the skeleton never get cold? Because it went right through him!
I took my mother-in-law out yesterday.
God being a sniper is so fun!
Friend: What fly's and cry's?
You: A cloud.
When the washer started running, why did you join me?
Because I had to catch it.
Monkey monkey monkey monkey.
What do you call a pig in the mud?
A Ky hot brown.
What does a bird say when it gets sick?
I flu!
I unironically shit myself. I am so sorry.
What do you call a guy with a big dick that likes to eat fish?
Long John Silvers or Captain D's.
What runs but does not walk? It's water.
Why do dogs like skeletons?
Because they're boneheads.