The doctor said I have until 2:30 to live.
That’s like 20 years from now, I said.
He looks at the time. It’s 2:30.
Short Jokes
Why do orphans like cows?
Because when they leave, they bring back the milk.
What do you call a crease join?
Hahaha
I'd make a joke about pizza, but it's too cheesy. I know y'all have too thick of a crust to get it!
Why do police never put an orphan in prison? It's too much like a home.
Mamma mia abortion clinic!
Your loss is our sauce.
My friend was playing a game and said he was fighting cultists, so I said Kanye's fanbase.
Why do people hate Velma now?
Because she joined the Dark Side.
You look easy to draw.
I wonder how many people read this wrong.
What does a pedophile call an orphanage?
A supermarket.
Hoi!
When you have erectile dysfunction, it could be expressed as the Leaning Tower of Pisa.
If you got a bowling ball and you stuck it on top of a sack of potatoes, what would you get?
A "retiree."
If I wanted to hear beeping, I wouldn’t have pulled my grandma’s cord to live.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
Because he can't find home.
Your mama so fat that when Thanos snapped his finger, it only got rid of weight.
What has nut, long, big, and sticky? A Snickers bar.
Last week I went on a whale watch.
After everyone had piled onto a boat, they loaded the boat onto a trailer and drove to your house.
My teacher made us watch a movie about the struggles of being an overweight person in this day and age.
It was really heavy on me.
