Short jokes

Short jokes

Maker

It looks like a runner bean, only smaller.

From the makers of Mangeone...

Time

That's the last time we park the TARDIS outside the portaloos at Glastonbury!

Dawn

Dawn rises on the Serengeti, and she has no idea as to how she got there.

Ex-wife

On my signal, I would like you to drive onto the pavement (sidewalk) and run over my ex-wife.

Orphan

What did the orphan say when he first played Sims? Dang, you can have a family!

Car

I really like those "driverless cars." I saw loads of them last week in the car park.

Supervision

People at school thought I had special powers. It was something called "Constant supervision."

Prank

Prankster pranks.

Fake lobster in the toilet. 8:00 a.m.

Prank phone calls. 9:00 a.m.

Excitement

Why did the oxygen molecules walk out of the singles bar with excitement?

Because she got Avogadro's number!

Beastiality

You know I really love going to school and meeting my crush.

All I have to do is go to the Africa section.

Difference

What's the difference between you, your uncle, and your dad?

One didn't go in the closet.

COVID-19

R. Kelly contracted COVID-19 recently. He was quoted as saying it was the first time he caught a case of anything over 18 in years.

Shooter

When you hide in the girl's bathroom so the school shooter won't go in there: 😃

When you notice that the school shooter is female: 😟

Friend

My friend said she was tired of seeing me every day.

So I pushed her off the side of a cliff.

Muslim

What do you call a Scottish Muslim with drug problems?

(Said in a Scottish accent) "Amaffmaheed."