Short jokes
Never got a mother's love, lol.
Real Pokémon.
Anxiety evolved into depression. Depression was the final stage evolution.
Win a free ride in a police car! Just pick up a knife and use it!
A priest and a rabbi run out of a burning building.
Priest: What about the children, Rabbi?
Rabbi: Fuck the children!
Priest: Do we have time?
I give you 31 because we will do the 69 later, thanks.
Where are the multi's? Where are they at? The placations?
"Hey, tie your shoes! I don’t want you falling for anyone else."
"Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?"
I’m still wearing the smile you gave me last week :)
Uranus be like, "Oh look, I'm Uranus. Imagine how disgusted I feel."
You ever get the feeling when your parents are cheating on you? I do.
Me: Am actually happy right now.
Life: Lol one sec.
Why did I cross the road to might get hit by a car or a bus?
Hey, join me. I be near the tree. Bring things to.
Hey, I'm Gwen. I just want to say I am speechless.
Hi Jake!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Cold.
Cold who?
"It is cold out here!"
"Hey Kenya, can we talk please!"
What do you call an overly clingy child?
A tumor.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't know where home is.