Short jokes
Freddy: I'm coming for you >:)
Me: God, no, help!
*game notification pops up with very loud sound*
I'm a magician. Watch my closing act at the end of the rope.
I told my sister to make a noise and hear what she said... "Cuckoo coo chew." #Owl🦉
You got no lotion to masturbate, then you remember there's some leftover porridge in the fridge. 😌🤎😇
What do you call a fat downie?
A couch potato.
I asked my dad to come to my Father’s Day breakfast.
The orphanage worker just said, “Don’t be silly!”
What do you call an LGBTQ person getting grilled? LGBBQ.
My dad came out of my step-sister's room as I came out of my step-mum's room.
What kind of flour do orphans use to make bread?
Self-raising.
What is an orphan's favorite Roblox game?
"Adopt Me."
Abortion isn't murder.
It's backspacing a typo.
What did one shark say to the other while eating a clownfish?
Person: "How many people have you had intercourse with?"
Me: "Nun."
Who needs parents to be great?
Bully: Shut up, motherfucker!
Me: Well, stop talking to me and I won't have to keep fucking your mother.
I hate it when I go to the shop and people are like, "Oh, hey what are you doing here?"
Me: "Oh, you know, just hunting elephants."
People in Africa have earth, fire, air, but never water.
ememe
Teacher: "Do you guys want to get in trouble?"
Kid named Teacher: *
What's the difference between an abortion and a baby girl in China? Nothing, they both die.