Short jokes
Why does the emo's mom like taking her son to the store?
Because the cashier can scan his wrist for discounts!
What does a student always get on an alphabet test?
A!
So I told an orphan if her mom is hot, he wouldn't stop crying.
Yoav
Your face needs to be put in the trash so people don't need to suffer.
Your head is so small, even a fly could eat it.
You are so blind, even a spider can see better than you.
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because there's no home.
What is the difference between an apple tray and an orphan? The apples get picked.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
The KGB.
The KGB wh-?
*slaps* I will ask the questions here.
Snowmen and snowwomen take a stomach piece, making snowballs.
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your mom's house.
Knock knock.
You: Who's there?
Your new father!
When a rocketship went into space, seven astronauts went into space. That's why it's called NASA.
I wasn't looking at you, your big forehead was distracting me.
Anybody remember 9/11? Cause I sure do, and oh boy was my father a good pilot!💥
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Grounded beef.
On one hand he was fantastic and the other a spastic. You could say he was a fantastic spastic.
Who said, "That's a small step for man, a giant leap for mankind?"
Not Stephen Hawking.
I was going to make alligator last night, but I noticed that I only had a crock pot.😅
How do you say “Yes, you look good” in Spanish?
– Sí...
See deez nuts!
Q: Why was the pilot sad?
A: 'Cause he was bad at playing Jenga. 💀