Short jokes
W fr W
What's the autistic kid's favorite song? Yours.
Why can’t you private text someone in a community?
Because a community has more than two people.
If an orphan wins the lottery, what do they have to use all of it on?
Years of child support!
Others, tearfully: Stop shipping real people!!
Me, packing an old lady in a FedEx box: Nope!
How do you win an argument against an emo kid?
Give him a gun, he'll just shoot himself.
What's an emo's favorite part about being dunked?
The hangover.
This is not a joke. Stop online dating.
Sometimes women are like bad snacks. People try them and then chuck them in the trash.
Why does the wind always blow from the "West" in Washington State?
Answer: Because IDAHO SUCKS!
You will never see a redneck opposing a war.
He will instead say, "Wait, I get to kill people and it's not illegal? And they're foreigners?"
It's not a war crime if no one's alive to report it.
It's not a hate crime if you don't hate the person.
Why do people adopt orphans?
They get cash.
Where do terrorists go for a drink?
At the Allahu-ak Bar.
Study tip: Laminate your notes so they don't get damaged by the tears!
Had an amazing night with this girl, woke up, and it was my aunt. Now I’m in love.
What do you call a bitch?
You call it a female dog.
What is a Jedi's favorite Italian dessert?
Obi-Wan Cannoli.
The cop that is on a 12 o'clock shift says, "Hands up!"