Short jokes

Short jokes

Beef

When someone asks you for a beef (fight), just say you're a vegetarian.

Fish

If there are 12 fish and 6 drown, how many are left?

12, because fish don't drown.

King

In the Middle Ages it was illegal for a blind man to become a king.

I mean, I don't see why not.

Cow

What did the cow say to his relatives on Christmas day?

Moorry Christmas!

(Even though cows can't really have religions.)

Doctor

What time is it if you sprain an ankle or an arm?

Time to go to the doctor! 🥼

Spanish

Spanish is difficult. When my mom gives me food, she says "toma," and that's drink in English, so I always drink my food.

Mom

Cause she knows how I like it, and that I’m a little young to be in the bed, butt-naked doin' your mom.

Mum

Your mum's so fat that when she goes to KFC, they run out of stock of chicken.

Gun

Why are the best used guns from France?

Because they have never been fired and they have only been dropped once.

Casket

Pass around the roses, their casket full of hoses, crash it, watch it, the water! OH SHIT IT'S GONNA BLOW!

Baby

What has 4 legs, then 3 legs, then 2 legs, then 1 leg, then no legs?

A baby you cut one off each time.