Short jokes
What moans about women but wouldn't exist without them? A triggered menimist.
These jokes are EGGxactly why I became a comedian, and I know how to BAKE on breakfast.
2 jokes in a row babyyyyy!
What is an orphan's favorite movie? Home Alone.
Why can't orphans play poker?
Because they don't know what a full house is.
When does a kid become an orphan?
When the parents leave.
Why is Donald Trump under so much stress?
Because he signed up to be on an album where somebody says "no love for the rich" on it.
That forehead is so tall it can eat a plane! Open wide!
I could never date a midget.
We would never see eye to eye.
Why can't women just shut the fuck up! I hate women. They need to know their place and stay in the kitchen and be baby makers...
What does an abortion joke and a fetus have in common... The joke never gets old, and neither does the kid.
What is the difference between an orphan and a homeless person? Nothing, haha.
Your mum is so fat that when she sat on the toilet, she couldn't because her fat ass can't fit on the toilet seat.
What holds the sun ☀️ up in the sky?
Sunbeams.
What war game can the French win? None, they are always losing.
What did the mother cheetah say to her cub?
"Go to bed or I'll slap your spots off you!"
If an old person tells you what to do just say, "At least my parents are alive!"
Tell someone to spell "Icup."
Answer: It will say, "I see you pee!"
I cry when you leave the room. They're tears of joy because you have an ugly hairline.
I tried to name my grass "emo" so it will cut itself.
Someone was bullying Stephen, so I said, "Why do you not stand up for yourself?"