Short jokes
Hi, I did not get your text. I texted you when I texted you. You are not [responding].
A redhead, a dark-haired woman, and a blonde walk into a bar and agree to fly to the sun!
The blonde states, "I agree, let's leave at night!"
Tumblr people: "There are an infinite amount of genders."
The cannibal kid: "Bitch, please. There's just one gender: Food."
What's got 4 legs and is stronger than Superman?
Christopher Reeve's horse.
Why is the chicken that crossed the road a cannibal? Because he went to KFC.
What kind of tree fits into your hand? A palm tree.
A kid with hallucinations and cancer is on a Jeopardy game show.
"What's behind curtain #1... YOU HAVE WON..... CANCER!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Robert Ryall
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
He tried to download a free version of Windows.
Why did 1 break the door open? Because 2, 3, 4.
Hey, can you hold this for a second?
How do you make antifreeze?
You steal her blanket.
I want diabetes so I can drink loads of Coke. - Louie Fennell 2018
Why is a cabbage green? Because it's in Greenland.
Why did the child cross the road?
To get to the other slide.
Who is Barry B. Benson’s favorite classical composer?
Bee-thoven.
What's better than a pile of dead babies?
One that's alive in the middle that has to eat its way out.
What was the doctor's diagnosis on a dinosaur with a low sex drive? Teraerectile dysfunction.
Why is a tree brown?
If you are thinking about this, you are racist.
Why do you make fun of disabled people?
They can't stand up for themselves.