Short jokes
My girlfriend broke up with me because I stole her wheelchair.
But I knew she’d come crawling back to me.
What do you call an anorexic bitch with a yeast infection?
Quarter pounder with cheese.
People can say whatever they want about pedophiles. At least they are pursuing their dreams.
In a white van.
Have you heard about the new Russian STD? Rottsmikokov.
What are you going to have for a face when the baboon wants its butt back?
Billy got a bike and a soccer ball for his birthday from his uncle, but he was very upset. Why? Because he has no legs.
What's the worst thing about eating a vegetable?
The wheelchair.
Why do mountains get so big?
They have no natural predators.
Saying balls go into pussy.
Why aren’t Indian Pakistanis allowed in the World Cup of baseball?
Every time they hit a corner, they open a shop.
What do angels serve at birthday parties in Heaven?
Angel food cake! 🎂🥳
Yesterday, a 5-year-old dyslexic boy almost saved his mother from drowning, but he kept dialing 119...
Why was Timmy so sad? Because his dad stapled a frog to his forehead.
What's the chunkiest part of vegetable soup?
The wheelchair.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Two gay lovers find out they are brothers.
Whoever invented school, I hope you burn in hell.
What is the reason for why women never look to the right?
Because they don't have any rights.
How did Voldemort lose his nose?
From uncontrolled Gold Mining!
Koalas are awesome!
When they say beat that pussy, I don’t play so punch it.