Short jokes
What is Forrest Gump's email password?
1forrest1
THERE IS NO AFTERLIFE.
Knock! Knock!
Who’s there? Control Freak. Con... OK, now you say, “Control Freak who?”
Orange: Hey.
Pear: Hey.
Orange: No hay!
-->[] go through the door if you can.
What famous book writer for kids loved insects?
Beatrix Potter.
I'd tell you a joke about my boyfriend's dick, but it's a private joke.
How do you spot a cow?
With a bingo dabber.
You’re so short you would need a lift to kiss your bride.
If you take your dog for a walk and you BOTH use the fire hydrant down at the corner...you might be a Redneck!
My chocolate babe is calling my name, and now I'm about to get my chocolate freak on.
1, 2, 3, 4, 5. I'm old enough to drive, for now I'm still alive, till I crash in that beehive!
KK or Liv?
Why were the apple and orange all alone? Because the banana "split."
What's the most confusing day of the year for an illegitimate kid?
Father's Day.
Why does new pavement smell like butt?
In other words you can also call it asphalt.
Ass-phalt.
What’s a foot on one end, a foot on the other end, and a foot in the middle?
A meter stick.
Do you have a halo?
'Cause I can give it to you.
What's the difference between a pizza and a guy you really hate?
One won't scream when you remove their meat.
Did you hear about the nasty tuna fish?
He was rotten to the albacore.