Short jokes

Why didn't Stephen Hawking cross the road?

Because he rolled over to the other side!

Cheesiest jokes.

What do you call a fake noodle?

An impasta!

What keeps you breathing when you're on Earth?

I don't know. I suffocated at birth.

What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?

"SUPPLIES!"

Where do you get 30% of your agua? From AGUAfers.

Why was Stephen Hawking so good at FIFA? He had 99 dribble.

What’s a nun's weapon of choice?

Nun-chucks.

What was going through the student's heads during a school shooting?

Bullets.

Write a different joke of onions and a dead baby.

What is the name of a show for kids?

Barney.

Why are eagles 🦅 bald?

Because they don’t wear wigs.

If bedbugs live in beds, where do cockroaches live?

Octopus, more like octopussy.

If you're feeling mad, punch an autistic kid. What's he gonna do, blabber to the teacher?

Hey, fatboy, why are you so damn fat?

Because every time I f*** your mom, she gives me a cookie.

Michael Jackson went into an Italian restaurant and died because he choked on 9-year-old meatballs.

School. School is a slavery joke and a Nazi joke combined.

So, I was in the woods the other day raping this woman when she screamed, 'Please! Think of my children!' I said, 'Ooo, you kinky bitch.'

I'll give you 20 dollars if you let me cum in you.