Short jokes

Mexican jokes and black jokes are pretty much the same.

Once you've heard Juan, you've heard Jamal.

I started an emo salsa band. We're called Hispanic at the Disco.

What did the kid with no arms get for Christmas?

A pair of gloves!

Nah, I’m not that mean, he’s still trying to open his presents.

If you are supposed to learn from your mistakes, why do some people have more than one child?

9/11 was like the 4th of July. It was very bright in the skies.

Why was I stress eating on the train track?

To wait to get hit.

It's been raining for days. My wife is totally depressed. She keeps looking through the window. If this keeps up, I'll have to let her in.

These jokes are so dark they almost stole my bike.

If you leave your small children inside a shower with Kelly Clarkson, you're a filthy parent.

What is the best part about Alabama prostitutes?

Family comes first.

I keep getting these letters from this little girl every year on Father's Day. I told the orphanage to stop letting her send these.

My friend called me a dick earlier. I said, "You are what you eat." He then proceeded to run away from me.

The suicide hotline didn't even give me advice on how to kill myself. Not helpful at all.

I have a joke about time travel, but I'm not gonna share it. You guys didn't like it.

I was asked at school to draw a line across the paper, but instead I showed them my wrists.

You know, people should really stop making fun of 911....both my parents died.

One driving one plane, and the other driving the other.

The more suicidal people there are, the less suicidal people there are.

What do you call a depressed emo? Dead.

Donald Trump is proudly anti-woke. He has been falling asleep in his court cases every morning!

Your move, Ron DeSantis.

So I was sitting on the couch with a woman, and I asked her, "Does this napkin smell like chloroform?"