Short jokes
Why did the orphan want to go to jail?
So he could have a home and be cared for with food.
Why can't a Leicester fan pull girls? He can only do the fox trot.
Why did the Titanic sink?
Because the people aboard are stupid.
What is the difference between a grandmother and a maid?
One is hope and the other is soap.
Why is 10 afraid?
Because he next to 9 and 11.
Can you be my daddy? 🍌😘😉
I'm going to pull out your lungs faster than Joe Biden pulled troops out of Afghanistan.
What do you call someone who has sex with foals, calves, and lambs? A Quadrupedophile.
Q: Why can orphans swim?
A: They have or-fins.
What did the peanut say to the cashew after their argument?
Inmate 1: Why are you in prison?
Inmate 2: I killed 4 people and robbed someone, what about you?
Inmate 1: I blew up a school bus.
Inmate 2: OMG, you demon! Were they autistic?
Inmate 1: No, they were Fortnite kids.
Inmate 2 (who is Muslim): Halelouia, we have found the messiah!
I had something about tripping over ice.
Well, it slipped my mind, so I'll just test some diamonds to see if they're ice.
Why is it painful to have your attorney with you in the hospital?
The damages are severe.
Why do orphans eat cereal with water?
Because their daddy still hasn't come home with the milk.
Explain Bear, I want to kiss you.
What’s the difference between a woman that doesn’t belong in the kitchen and Bigfoot?
Bigfoot is real.
Why the fuck is this guy calling me a crying bitch?
I tried dressing up as the plane that crashed into the Twin Towers for the office costume party.
It didn't land too well.
Why did the silly girl put sugar under her pillow?
She wanted to have sweet dreams. 😂
Society: :-) I: :') Society: you're doing it WRONG. It's :-) not :') I: :'D