Johnny: Mommy, Mommy! What is incest?
Mom: Shut up and keep licking.
Short Jokes
You call it a tragedy. I call it a 25 killstreak.
How much of a homophobic heterosexual man are you? I'm so homophobic I won't suck a big dick that has ketchup on it.
Why did Mickey Mouse go to outer space?
To find Pluto.
Why did the picture go to jail?
Cause it was framed!
9/11 was like the 4th of July. It was very bright in the skies.
When the chair was invented, the inventor's friend wanted to know what it did. The inventor replied: "You might want to sit down for this."
Mexican jokes and black jokes are pretty much the same.
Once you've heard Juan, you've heard Jamal.
I started an emo salsa band. We're called Hispanic at the Disco.
I don’t like making jokes about 9/11. My grandad died in it, he was the greatest pilot I ever knew.
What did the choir boy sing to the priest? Nothing, his mouth was full.
How do emos propose?
"Would you like to join my family tree?"
If you donate one kidney, everybody loves you, and you’re a total hero. But donate five, and suddenly everyone is yelling. Geez!
My grief counselor died today. He did such a great job. I don't even care.
Why do people like dating us emo girls? Because of the texture on our thighs.
You shouldn’t bully fat people.
They already have enough on their plate.
Why are most firefighters men? Because they like to find hot places and leave them wet.
(This is a fucked up pick up line). Are you a building? Because I rate you 9/11.
Claustrophobic people are more productive thinking out of the box.
If I make a summer camp for kids with concentration problems, will it be a "Concentration Camp"?
