Short jokes

Your mom is so fat that when she went to the dentist, the man said, "One at a time."

Take a step back... just like your hairline did.

Your hairline is so far back, when your forehead was playing tag, your hairline ran away real far.

My teacher called me beautiful. I hate when she lies.

Mary: If you born pikin (child) inside shop, wetin you go call that pikin (child)?

Mike: The pikin (child) go bear Bishop.

Why don’t I shut myself all the time?

I can only fit so many pairs of kids in my mouth and stomach at the same time.

"I have a three-head."

"I have a four-head."

Bald people have a seven-head.

What do you do when your man doesn't like fruit jokes?

Let the mango.

Hey Ryan, what do you call a wall so large no man can conquer?

Answer: Ryan's forehead.

Are you acid, cause I want to throw [you] at my face?

Roses are red, violets are violet. I mean, come on, it's literally in the name!

My grandpa said this generation relies too much on tech, so I unplugged his life support.

This ain't a joke, but the Twin Towers said their favorite number is 911.

Did you leave your hairline at the airplane, because it's going up?

What's an orphan's least favorite show? Family Guy ;)

It’s not like they can watch it anyway: it’s PG.

I dressed up as Darth Vader at an orphanage and said, "I am your father!"

Why are orphans bad at baseball?

Because they don't know where home is.

I don't think I could ever become a beggar. I really don't like change.

The companies that made the hand gel sanitizer must be absolutely rubbing their hands together!

Why do so many kids die in school shootings? Because you're not allowed to run in the corridors.