Short jokes
How do blind people know when to stop wiping?
With a taste test.
Did you hear about the deaf guy's STI?
He got hearing aids.
What do you call a blowjob in Africa?
Breakfast.
How are Black people like communism?
Because they’ll never work, but some of them are willing to give it a shot.
I don’t know why I go to the gym. Being healthy is dying as fast as possible, and I really want to speed that shit up.
Why did the emo kids stop going to their favorite tree?
It died before them.
"I got that dawg in me," said the Asian men after lunch.
When cops say you have the right to remain silent,
You're just happy you have the right to do something.
How do you know Adam and Eve were white?
Have you ever tried taking a rib from black women?
Why don’t Indians play soccer?
Because every time they’re at the corner, they build a store.
A blind kid was talking to me because he was getting bullied...
I told him, "Just tell them what you see!"
My son told me he wanted to be Batman when he grows up. That little shit wants to be gunned down in an alley.
What song does Kobe Bryant hate?
"Rocky Mountain High."
Why do people hit their electronics when they don’t work?
You keep the tradition of hitting black things.
I feel bad for the kids at Sandy Hook. All they wanted was books, but got magazines instead.
I just prevented an 11-year-old from getting assaulted.
I decided to go home.
What’s one thing women need to know nowadays?
Their place.
What’s the difference between a fly and Lady Diana?
The sound when they hit the windshield.
What is the worst thing about dating a blind woman?
Getting her husband's voice just right.
I hooked up with my German girlfriend, but I kept on getting distracted when she kept yelling her age.