Short jokes
"Nun" means no one likes them. Just take off that dumb hood!
Do you play COC?
Because it’s a pretty good game.
South Tower: Man, that was da bomb.
North Tower: No, that was da plane.
What's a gun's favorite type of literature?
Magazine.
Wow, you did 10 chin-ups? Was it 1 for each chin?
Q: What are cheetahs?
A: The worst card players!
What is the similarity between math and buildings?
Two parallel lines can be intersected by a plane.
Why did Hellen Keller's dogs run away?
Because wouldn't you runway too if your name was djhdhekdndyekedhekekfjkfurir?
POV: You go to Asian prison.
You get served extra rice.
How do you make a cat say woof? You cover it in petrol and light a match.
What did the llama say when the villagers said that he had to leave the village?
"Alpaca my bags."
Three boys are in the 4th grade; one is black, one is white, and the other is Hispanic. Who has the biggest penis?
The black one... he's 13!
When the feminists find out that it's humanity, not huwomanity.
Why did the woman cross the road?
What’s she doing out of the kitchen in the first place?
Why couldn't the annoying dog get on Papyrus's nerves?
HE'S A SKELETON. HE DOESN'T HAVE ANY.
"Karma is the guy on the Chiefs, Coming straight home to me."
- Sometimes I feel like killing myself...
- But?
- ...
How many CIA agents does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
They don't need lightbulbs--they glow in the dark.
Q. How does an ISIS terrorist practice safe sex?
A. He marks the camels that kick.
Son: Dad, where are you?
Dad: Getting another one.
Son: Getting what?
Dad: Dad.