Short jokes

Short jokes

People

My friend said that gay people existed 10 years ago.

He can tell the future.

President

If you think of a president as your king, then the USA got checkmated on November 22nd, 1963.

Pizza

I can't believe this!

Pizza is round and it comes in a square box, and you cut it into a triangle.

Sister

Sister: You're so stupid.

Me: Calling me stupid doesn't make you any smarter!

Helen Keller

Helen Keller: *Gets knocked to the floor*

Helen Keller (in her head): "Wow, I didn't see that coming!"

School

After I see an anime boy acting cool,

Me at school acting cool:

My brothers: "He's just acting cool."

Me: I'm gonna kill u 0.0

Man

What's the difference between a crumbled man and 9/11... nothing, they're both crumbled.

Age

I came across a pic of the oldest man on earth on IG. He was 132 years old.

I commented "age is just a number" for him; now I'm banned.

Thor

Chris Hemsworth is Australian, and Thor is from space. Does that make him an Australien?