Short jokes
Girlfriend after sex: How did you get so good at eating pussy?
Boyfriend: My mom taught me.
When your girl is sucking your dick and chokes on it, not because it’s big but because you haven’t washed it in weeks.
Why do pedos like to lose races? Because they like to cum on a little behind.
What do you call a fish with two knees?
I've got a jar of dirt! I've got a jar of dirt, and guess what's inside it!
Uranus floats around in space.
Q: Why is Japan the healthiest country?
A: Last time they had a fat man, 80,000 people died.
Why do disabled people always get picked on?
Because they can’t stand up for themselves.
Joe Biden doesn’t follow his own f**king mask mandate.
I've always wanted to WAVE to a dolphin, but it could never SEA me.
That dolphin is so WASHED up. WATER you say we get revenge?
The past, present, and future walk into a bar.
It gets really tense.
99% of Roblox usernames be like: bdiejfbsie3hdiejdbisie882jeoxnd, by yYidgJyeuzyei73*-;ujduzjehzisjd, and j73heisbdjJd3nakwnwo2jdieneidjd.
What does Jesus do when he gets nervous? He bites his nails.
I gave a blind kid a gun and told him it was a hairdryer.
I love me a nice tight pussy. That's why I'm in big trouble with RSPCA.
Your mom's so heavy that it caused Atlas, the Titan, to slip a disc.
What is a failed abortion? Annabelle.
Have you heard about the animal that was made of a human hand?
It's an ARMadillo.
GF: What did you use as kissing when you were little?
Me: My sister.
SWEET HOME ALABAMAA
I had to take my pet octopus to the vet yesterday.
Oh, don't worry, he's okay now.
But the vet charged me six quid.