Short jokes
When a girl was having an asthma attack, Ariana said, "Just keep breathing and breathing and breathin!!!!!"
What do dead babies and fruit have in common? Both can become smoothies with the help of a blender!
Why is the last part of orphanage "age?"
Because it doesn't matter your age.
How do you call a virgin girl in Alabama? An orphan.
Girl, is your butt made of water, because it is tubig?
Gwen is a liar. She said she is a Christian and then is saying bad, bad, bad, bad words. Shame on you, Gwen, LIAR!
A man who thinks he's funny but is actually a transvestite/transformer.
Why did the chicken cross the road to get away from this conversation?
Sister: Hey sis, how are you today?
Me: Oh, good, you?
Sister: Good, 'cause I heard you finally got a good living life.
Yo mama so stupid, when I said, "Go deep," she dug a hole in the field.
How do you check that a rabbit is old?
You check how many gray hares it has.
I would make a joke about Kobe, but I don't think it would fly very well.
Why did the banana like the movie?
Because it was apeeling.
Beast joke ever: my life... Oh wait, I don't have one.
What do you call a cow's facial hair?
A moostache.
You know what is the worst mistake every human being made?
Answer: Living.
I know why Stephen Hawking loves Transformers so much now.
Autobots, "Roll Out!"
What do you get when you mix Harry Houdini, a basketball, and the 17th president?
Magic Johnson.
What did the fish say when seeing his best mate?
"I sea him!"
What do turtles use to communicate?
A shellphone!