Short jokes
What did the two towers make after they died? The One World Trade Center.
What do you call a Japanese person when their knees are cured?
"Happynese" (happy knees).
You're so fat, you drank an invisibility potion, and everyone could still see you!
You are so ugly, when the devil saw you, he said, "Jesus Christ!"
My wife told me she was fat and depressed. She asked me to compliment her, so I said, "You have perfect eyesight!"
Your mum is so fat, when she roleplayed Wonder Woman, she couldn't fit in the invisible jet.
I could have sworn while watching anime I saw an American Boeing B-29 Superfortress in the background dropping bombs!
Which tower is better at playing catch? The south tower, obviously. It caught 2!
Why is emo grass better than normal grass?
Emo grass is gonna cut themself.
Quote Of The Day: Where there is no struggle, there is no strength.
Love you guys, and hope today was amazing!
Peace out! <3
A grasshopper tries playing cricket. It failed and got eaten by the bat.
Titanic is more bent than a hairline.
Why is Mars red and not orange? Because it would be too bright.
I played Uno with my Mexican friend.
That bastard took all the green cards!
When you realize your friend standing next to you is adopted and narrates everything he does.
Should I kill the main character's best friends in my book? It's an autobiography.
A special quote: “I was gonna slap that girl into tomorrow!”
Random person: "What's one thing your ex gave you that you can't get rid of?"
Man: *Shows a picture of his child.*
When I hotline bling, I only need one thing.
You're pretty, pretty dumb.