Why can't you fool an aborted fetus?
Because it wasn't born yesterday.
Short Jokes
What do you get when you get yourself a deer with no eyes?
You get no-eye-deer.
Normal people: I'm my own nationality.
Michael Jackson: Click here to change nationality.
Ariana Grande
One time my friend nutted into my bag of trail mix.
I guess you could say I fucking ate a different kind of nut.
My eggcellent egg yolks crack everyone up.
If you don't like them, you're just hard boiled.
Why do cats like to sing? They're very mewsical!
Girls with the name Zoe have big foreheads.
Why do Roman Catholics have so many kids?
So there’s more for the priest.
You're so poor, even the store didn't let you buy anything free.
I saw a kid crying yesterday, and I asked him, "Where are your parents?" Then he started crying harder.
My friend asked me once, "Is there any religion in the world that preaches a god who masturbates in a closed room?"
"Islam it is."
What has ten children crying, naked, and screaming for their parents?
My big green pedo machine.
"Uh daddy harder," the orphan said. Oh wait, he doesn’t have a daddy.
What do you call a white kid at the back of class?
A school shooter.
You're so ugly your mom and dad abandoned you, and you went to the adoption center, and not even the adoption center would take you or let you in.
Ever heard of the game T.T.2: 9/11? That game was bomb.
I have double standards: burn a body at a crematorium and you're being a respectful friend; do it at home and you're destroying evidence.
I love orphans, so at least they know someone loves them.
If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?
