Short jokes
What's the difference between having sex with my girlfriend and a baby?
I don't have a girlfriend.
What's the difference between a million dollars and a million dead babies?
I don't have a million dollars laying around my house.
Go punch an orphan, what are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
What does a South African Batman wear? A cape.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the idiot's house.
Knock knock?
Who's there?
The chicken!
Why did the midget not go to bed?
He couldn't reach the bed.
Why does a giraffe need such a long neck?
Because its head is so far away from its body.
Three Nazis walk into a bar.
Last time Kenny ate a vegetable, he got banned from his mom's nursing home.
Your Momma's so fat, the recursive function calculating her mass causes a stack overflow.
What is Trump's favorite snack?
Cheetos.
(Get it? He looks like a Cheeto!)
Adam and Eve had sex. It was paradise.
What does it take to paint a wall red?
Kurt Cobain and his shotgun.
"Wheel" all miss him, right?
What's the difference between a little boy and a freezer?
The freezer doesn't scream when you put your meat in it.
I’m a clown...
And everyone knows.
You have more chin than brain cells!
I like porn a lot. I was wondering if you guys can talk to me.
I need to fuck an emo girl... those bitches are limited edition!
Two Asians walked into a strip club and they went to a cashier. They put in their names: her name was He Gay and his name was Shi A Ho.