Short jokes
There was a blackout in my neighborhood last night. The police told us to stay inside until they shot him.
A single sentence walks into a bar.
A blind man once told me he smokes a lot because he has nothing to look forward to. Well, let's just say that I see his point.
What colors were Kurt Cobain's eyes? Blue! One blew right and the other blew up!
Mom! I think that dad is sleeping.
Mom: No, honey, I killed him.
Stop copying each other, fucking losers!
What pants do you wear to church? Hole-y ones.
Who invented fractions?
Henry the 1/8.
Why are colds such bad robbers?
Because they're so easy to catch.
How many times do you tickle a squid before it laughs?
TEN-TICKLES
Josh: Tell me something funny.
Mark: My life.
You want to hear a joke about pizza?
Sorry! Can't tell ya, it's too cheesy!
A Nacho has a problem going on, and the Taco says to the Nacho, "Wanna taco 'bout it?"
And the Nacho says to the Taco, "It's nacho problem!"
What do skeletons say before they eat?
Bone appΓ©tit. ( Ν‘Β° ΝΚ Ν‘Β°)
How can you tell if Google is a girl?
It makes suggestions before you finish your sentence!
What do you get when you cross a stick and a dog? A run away joke...
What's a brother and sister from Alabama's favorite sex position?
The cowgirl.
Y'all, I'm suspended till Wednesday and can't do much cuz I'm on a tablet, not my computer. Tell autterpop I won't be on till Wednesday or after.
What's the difference between your mom in bed and Biden in the presidential race?
Your mom finishes.
What's the difference between a Palestinian and a redneck?
At least the redneck was drunk when he married his cousin.