Short jokes
Why don't you act like an amoeba and split?
Hello Miss Chandia, here. I want to tell you guys a joke.
What do jokes serve for dessert?
I have had an obsession with soap. Don’t worry, I am all clean now!
Why did Rolf Harris meet underage kids?
To tie his kangaroo down, sport!
What do a school shooter and a person with gum have in common?
One's the pull it out everyone wants to be their friend.
What do you get when you cross a pedophile and an elementary school? Predator 3.
Why did the cumulonimbus not show up for work?
Because it was on strike.
Someone threw a cup at my eye. I told 911 that I was mugged.
Where does a pianist go on vacation?
The Florida Keys.
Taja?
I always win arguments against my handicapped girlfriend; she can't stand for herself.
Why do they call them apartments when they are together?
What do me and a casino machine have in common? It takes about 50 pumps to get to the jackpot.
Fat people should expect big things when they take their shirt off.
What’s the difference between a barcode and Rachel Sutherland’s wrist?
Nothing, they both get scanned for a fresh new pack of razor blades.
You would think catholic churches would be in favor of condoms: less DNA evidence.
Never hide something behind a bookshelf. It's the oldest trick in the book!
Why are Democrats represented by the donkey? Because some Democrats can be such an ass!
Using pi, distract the fat kid next to you so you can copy his answers.
Me scrolling through jokes that sum up my life, starts crying.
My friend: What’s wrong?
Me: Nothing, it's just so funny. Lol😂🤣😂