Short jokes
What time is it when you get a chance to take a car and drive all over?
Time to get in trouble!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Atch.
Atch who?
Sorry you are sneezing. Have you got a cold?
What is a superhero’s 🦸♀️ favorite drink?
Fruit punch!
What do crows use when they get a phone?
A "CAWing" card!
Sheep want to wool the world :)
Why are elephants 🐘 so responsible?
Because they keep their belongings in the trunk.
Don’t you hate it when your teacher(s) say, “just focus, it’s that easy?”
And then you die inside.
What do you call a flying skunk?
A smelicopter.
What do you call a short person that goes to school?
A Sammie.
Wood-fired pizza.
How would pizza get a job now?
What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese. Okay, I can't do this anymore.
Me: DOCTOR! DOCTOR! I HAVE 50 SECONDS TO LIVE!
Doctor: Sit down for a minute.
What do you call a farting boxer?
Gaseous Clay.
Papyrus: Nyhe heh heh! I got a swim suit! And it even says cool dude!
Sans: I guess now it says pool dude ;)
Papyrus: SSSSAAAAANNNNSSSS!
Roses are red, violets are blue, when The Oh Hellos saw you they said "Shoo!"
I love going to church to get closer to God, but my least favorite part of church has to be touching the priest’s penis.
What’s the worst thing about being suicidal?
The school shooter will always spare you.
Why did the emo kid get mad?
I wore a “Just Do It” shirt.
What do KFC and a brothel have in common?
They’re both full of greasy chicks.
My grandfather lost his tongue during WW2.
He never talks about it.