What do fire and people have in common?
They will both eventually die out.
Short Jokes
A good bath is like a dead lover.
You can enjoy them, that is until they get too cold.
What did Hitler tell the eye doctor?
“I can na-zi.”
What’s bad about swinging a dead baby above your head?
Stopping it with the shovel!
When it comes to recycling toilet paper, you really need to process the crap out of it.
Only if onions were emo, they'd cut themselves.
How many time does it take to cook a baby in a microwave?
I don’t know, I can’t count while masturbating.
What do you call a bunch of Aboriginals rolling down a hill?
Abo-lanche.
I asked Michael Jackson when did he lose his virginity. He just replied with "HEHE!"
Potato.
What's the difference between Jesus and a painting of Jesus?
A painting only takes one nail to be hanged.
So Kobe Bryant walked into a bar, just kidding, he's dead and his fame went spiraling out of control.
I’ve got a joke about Alzheimers.
Um.
Oh no. I can’t actually remember it.
No scope, bitch!
What do you call an orphan family photo?
A selfi.
Why did Billy kill himself with a TV remote?
He wasn't even REMOTELY close to being happy.
What do you call a girl skeleton dancing?
A bone-étit.
My brother finally got his driver's license, so he took our new car out for a spin.
At least now I can have his phone he left.
My friend told me an emo joke once, and I said, "Emo jokes aren't funny, cut it out!"
What did the airplane say to the paper plane? Why do you look like a wimp?
