Short jokes
When I hit a home run, I finally felt what it was like to have a home.
I don't like calculator jokes because they are too overused.
What do you tell a suicidal person when they complain about their problems to you?
Just hang in there, man.
Two friends were hanging out with each other next to a tree.
Too bad only one was standing. :)
Science teacher: How many times can the earth fit into the sun?
Me: As many times as the earth can fit into you.
Me as a 5-year-old: How do you relate to the Twin Towers?
Friend: What?
Me: Every time I think of them, I feel sad.
How's your dad?
What? I forgot he's still sleeping.
What do you call Kevin with no beef?
Chicky.
Why was the emo person dead inside?
Because I stole their insides.
What did the floor say to the ceiling?
"I look up to you."
"Cummy Beynis. Hahaha?"
Why can’t the emo play in trees? They’ll leave ‘em hanging.
What do you get when you cross a mosquito with a mountain climber?
Nothing. You can't cross a vector and a scalar.
I can’t help you find orphan jokes. Maybe ask their family.
Dentist: “This will hurt a little.”
Patient: “OK.”
Dentist: “I’m having an affair with your wife!”
Imagine being expelled from school for bringing a weapon to school.
If a homeschooled kid shoots his parents, does that count as a school shooting?
Why is the Azovstal Steel Plant important to the Russian?
Because it stores Zelensky's balls of steel!
What did the creep do when the woman said, “Make yourself at home?”
He hid in her attic.
Gen Z is most likely going to be the last generation who felt the pain of getting up early to catch their favorite show.