Short jokes
Where does a banana learn to split?
At sundae school!
Why did the wetback cross the river? To get to the US.
How did the blind boy's parents punish him?
Rearrange the furniture.
Ask someone if they are a rhino. If they say yes, tell them "so you're horny." And if they reply yes again, block them from your life entirely.
Poop and balls through the walls!
Three gay men enter a bar in Iran. They don't come out.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?
Apples get picked.
What will fall faster, an emo or an apple?
An apple, because the emo would get caught on the rope.
Ur mom is so fat that when she came to the front door, she was already at the back door.
Moment and I
Why did Jeffrey eat all the ice cream in one sitting?
To make room in the freezer for his special meat.
What do you get when you cross an alligator with a vest?
An investigator.
Why did the pervert cross the road?
'Cause he was stuck to the chicken.
What do you call a dinosaur that loves sucking dino dick?
Sucks-alota-cocka-sorass.
What do you call a black prostitute with braces?
A Black & Decker pecker wrecker.
Here is a good joke: asking for consent before sex.
Rapunzel's hair is longer than your dad's existence.
I searched up self harm jokes, clean, but I couldn't find any :[
"Vladymoron Pootin and Drunkard Chump sittin' in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G."
What is brown and sticky? A stick!