Short jokes

I don't need a punchline. Karens are the only joke I need.

What's the difference between men and pigs? Pigs don't turn into men when they drink.

When my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? I told him everyone knows he doesn't hire stupid people.

I accidentally handed my wife a glue stick instead of a chapstick. She still isn't talking to me.

Time waits for no man, time is obviously a woman.

I asked my wife to embrace her mistakes.

She gave me a hug.

What do you call a cute boy with Down syndrome?

Awwtistic.

Want to know how to fit 71 people in a car? Two in the front while we handle 69 in the back.

asdf.

Harry Potter is a movie about a grown adult man with an unhealthy obsession with a teenage boy.

I lit a retirement home on fire so that all the seniors can be cremated for free.

I became anti-furry because I don't want Doom Slayer after me.

"Lord of the Rings" is about a group of white Americans taking nine hours to return jewelry.

It's not a hate crime if you don't hate the person.

It's not a war crime if no one's alive to report it.

You will never see a redneck opposing a war.

He will instead say, "Wait, I get to kill people and it's not illegal? And they're foreigners?"

School would be a lot different if the quiet kid had an RPG.

Roses are red, violets are blue, don't look in my backyard, or I will come for you.

So can we agree that Jesus was the first victim of cancel culture?

My friend: Hey, I got 15 kills!

Me: I got 60 kills!

My friend: I didn't know you played Call of Duty!

Me: What's Call of Duty?