Short jokes
What do you call a batter in a hot air balloon?
Why was Six afraid of Seven?
Because 7 was accused of the murder of 26 children.
What is Vladimir Putin's favorite song?
Answer: Crimea River!
Question: Why did Donald Trump convert to Judaism?
Answer: Because he heard that Vladimir Putin likes to drink vodka with "Orange Jews"!
The doctor said I have until 2:30 to live.
That’s like 20 years from now, I said.
He looks at the time. It’s 2:30.
Why don’t orphans play baseball?
Because they can’t find home.
What do the Spanish people call child abuse? Pedrophile.
I tried to adopt an orphan. The card got declined harder than the child did.
Why does Darth Vader always choke people?
Because he wants them to feel what his Sith Lord does to him in bed.
Why does Yoda like to get molested? Because he likes the Force.
Why does the Jedi never join the dark side?
If they did, then they would lose the opportunity to molest young padawans.
What's in a Michael Jackson hotdog?
A 50-year-old piece of meat.
A 12-year-old bun.
Every time a Light Saber goes off, it's just a Jedi Master getting hard over a kid. Lol.
Why are emos jealous of light?
The lights are hanging.
You are so fat and ugly, Chucky didn't even want to play with you.
Your hairline and your eyebrows are social distancing.
Damn, this new Angry Birds is fire!
Yo life so miserable, the adoption center wouldn't sell you, just give you away!
I would have a joke for my friend... but he can't afford the punchline.
I should probably stop making jokes about 9/11.
My dad died to it, he was a great pilot.