Short jokes

Me going to the principal's after telling the kid with a wheelchair to stand up for himself.

Bro, you look like you got your hair from the Roblox avatar shop.

I hate school. I mean, why can't you pull out a 12 gauge and shoot everyone, including the teachers?! This generation is too soft, man.

You are so ugly, when the devil saw you, he said, "Jesus Christ!"

You are so ugly, when the Joker saw you, he stopped laughing.

You're so skinny, you can barely fit through a door crack.

Why do people play basketball?

Because they want to learn how to suck balls.

Yo hairline so ugly, when you go to school you fall on a line.

What does an orphan's life and a pseudoword have in common?

They both have no meaning.

College is the opposite of kidnapping. They demand $100,000 from you, or they'll send your kid back.

When people say they get ho's: You don't get no ho's, the only ho's you get is in yo draws.

I'd like to see things from your point of view, but I can't seem to get my head that far up my ass.

Just burned 2,000 calories. That's the last time I leave brownies in the oven while I nap.

Entered what I ate today into my new fitness app, and it just sent an ambulance to my house.

Smoking will kill you.

Bacon will kill you.

But, smoking bacon will cure it!

Math Teacher: "If I have 5 bottles in one hand and 6 in the other hand, what do I have?"

Student: "A drinking problem."

Roses are red, violets are blue,

Your mum's so fat, she broke Britain too!

Your mamma so fat Thanos had to clap 4 times.

You're so fat, you drank an invisibility potion, and everyone could still see you!

The last thing the victims were thinking was, "Is there 9 or 11 stories?"