Short jokes
Well, you know what they say, time flies when you're just a ball of anxiety and stress. :D
When you see your mom.
Me: bruh
Her: Are you serious right now bro?
Me: Yeah no shit.
Her: *slaps me*
When butterflies fall in love, do they feel humans in their stomach?
Hey kids, guess who started a micronation?
It’s Barney and Trump. They don’t let gays in, but they kill them.
What do you call a very long bowl?
Manute Bowl.
What the when what yeah what yeah then uh huh?
Boy, your forehead so big, I can make a launchpad on that shit!
I came across a dead body in the woods. I liked it so much I came again.
You twin towers because I'm tryna ram in you tonight.
Why is the record for longest jump kept by an emo?
They're still hanging.
No, it's not just a crotch grab. Jacko was jacking it on stage when he saw a 6-year-old boy in the front row.
How do you get Wacko Jacko to come inside your shop? Have little boys' pants half off!
I was gobsmacked when I encountered the Jacko special at a Bunnings sausage sizzle. A 40-year-old sausage on 7-year-old white bread.
When Hitler killed himself, he shot himself twice. The first one was Operation Barbarossa, and the second one was his death.
what does an orphanage and a hospital have in common?
people go there to fix their mistakes.
ENTER PASSWORD.
WRONG.
WRONG.
WRONG.
WRONG.
WRONG.
WRONG.
RESET PASSWORD.
NEW PASSWORD CAN'T BE OLD PASSWORD.
Sets fire to computer.
Uber driver: .........
Me: .........
Uber driver: .........
Me: 5 stars.
Why can't an orphan get married? It doesn't have its parents' blessing.
What do the initials POOP stand for?
Polacks Order Our Poop. 💩 💩 💩 💩 💩 💩 💩 💩 💩 💩 💩
My cousin: “How’s the lemonade stand supposed to run when you’re at softball practice?!”
Me: “Lemonade stands can’t run, dufus.”