Short jokes
Don’t have phone sex without protection, you might get hearing aids!
Why couldn't the bicycle stand? It was two tired...
Why did the guitarist get fired as a carpenter? He was shredding the floor...
Why didn't the toilet paper cross the road? It got stuck in a crack.
What do you call a down syndrome person that was hit by a car?
Mash potato.
My short friend called me a scrub, even though he was the one below me.
Why couldn’t the kitten watch the movie? It had a violent cat-e-gory.
What did the clock say when it got punched at noon?
It’s twelve o'clock.
I used to have a friend who worked at a car shop who liked hunting.
I’m not friends with him anymore because he turned my dog into a car-pet.
What did Pennywise become after LEAVING the circus? Ex-IT.
What do you call someone who used to kill people? An ex-executioner.
What kind of mountain does everyone like?
Mountain Dew!!! Hahah.
Why can't Helen Keller drive?
'Cause she's already dead.
The grapes in the supermarket are really raisin' the bars...
What games do you play if you are bored?
Board games.
Two fish walked into a wall. One said to the other, "Dam!"
Have you ever walked into Stephen Hawking's house?
No, neither has he.
Down syndrome and brownies.
Where can you find the freshest vegetables? A school for the disabled!
Why did the pedophile cross the road?
To get to the other preschool.