Short jokes
Have you ever had Ethiopian food?
Don't worry, neither have they.
When I'm cutting my grass, want to know what it reminds me of? My arms and legs.
Knock knock! Who's there? Deja. Deja who? Knock knock!
You're so fat, astronomers discovered a planet larger than Earth but smaller than Uranus.
Will Will Smith smith?
Yes, Will Smith will smith.
What do you get when you put a baby in a box of razor blades and throw it down the stairs?
An erection!
What is the best thing about a gipsy on her period?
When you finger her, you get your palm red for free.
What happens if you mix a dick with a potato?
You get a dictator dic-dick-tator-potato!
The Columbine High School basketball team hasn't been the same since they lost their two best shooters.
What do you call a grey, fat, and very old unicorn?
A rhino.
Yo mama's so old, when she was a girl, rainbows were black and white.
How do you circumcise a redneck? Kick his sister in the jaw.
God said, "Let there be light," and it was lit!
Johnny: Mommy, Mommy! What is incest?
Mom: Shut up and keep licking.
Yo mama's so poor, I knocked on the front door of her house and realized I was already outside in her backyard!
I like my couches like my women... Old, used, and big enough to fit 3 men.
I believe "Self-Baptism" is a nice way of saying "Failed Suicide Attempt."
What did the skeleton say to Shrek?
"Jump on me. I can have two layers of skin too."
Our family is known for unusually sloppy diarrhea.
It runs in our jeans.
I've been told I've got a perfect cock.
She sure was hard on me when I took it from her, though.