Short jokes

Short jokes

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I own a pencil that used to be owned by William Shakespeare, but he chewed it a lot.

Now I can't tell if it's 2B or not 2B.

How can you tell the difference between a Christian priest and a zit?

One waits until you're twelve to come on your face.

So there was this kid being bullied by four other kids. I decided to step in.

He didn’t stand a chance against the five of us.

  • 5

    • What sits in the corner and gets smaller and smaller? A baby with a potato peeler.

    Santa was asked to describe Mrs. Claus in three words. His response was, "Ho ho ho."

  • 6

    • Jack and Jill went up the hill so Jack could lick her candy, but Jack had a shock and a mouth full of cock, and Jill's real name was Randy.

    I once had clothes that were so unbearably uncomfortable,

    but I never realized they suited me.

    The witch doctor came in my mouth last week. First hot meal I’ve had in weeks.

    Hey mum, why do people keep suddenly dying in our family?

    Mum?

    Mum?

    Muuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuum!

  • 0

    • A student got a bad letter grade, so the next day he came back with his own letter grade in his backpack: an A-K47.