Short jokes

Short jokes

"Kill yourself. Stop thinking whether or not to do it, you dumb fucking cunt, no one likes you. Jump off a fucking 3 story building, bitch."

How did Stephen Hawking really die?

His wife grounded him from using electronics and unplugged everything!

When I nailed the quiz, my teacher wasn't very happy. I wasn't either with all those paper cuts.

Oof.

A Christian Missionary walks up to some people and says, "Come! Meet Jesus!"

One of the guys takes out a knife and says, "You first."

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  • What do you call a skeleton who went out in the snow? A numb skull!

    When your sad don’t feel down about yourself break someone’s leg and laugh.

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  • My grandpa is an asshole. The fucker deserved to die. The son of a bitch was using his life support, and I needed to change my iPhone.

    What's worse than 2 dead babies in a trash bin? Two babies in one trash bin.