Short jokes
Wanna hear a good joke?
My dad’s love for me.
Apparently Steven Hawking was a stand-up kind of guy.
What did the deaf, blind, mute, and paralyzed baby get for Christmas?
AIDS.
What do you get when you throw a baby into the wheat thresher?
An erection.
If you had 10 chicken nuggets and Jimmy tried to steal one, what would you have?
10 chicken nuggets and a dead Jimmy.
Candy is dandy.
But liquor is quicker.
Everyone laughs when a bully teases someone, but no one laughs when that person commits suicide.
Guess what Sally got for Christmas? Gloves! Jk, she still hasn't opened it.
What did the stepbrother and stepsister do together?
Oof, mitosis!
David? Mitosis.
What did Allan say to his sister bully when she stepped on his toe? "Mitosis!"
What is the cherry's favorite cartoon?
"Tom and Jerry!"
Finish the sentence.
Salt and Vi.....
What is a pedophile's favorite song?
Jerking off in A minor.
What did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? She gagged and moaned.
What is a priest's favorite song?
-- Magic Flute in A minor.
What did the dog say to his sister when she stepped on his toe? "Hey, mitosis!"
What place is Flo Rida from? Florida.
Where is a place where people die?
Rosshall Academy.
What's a goat's favorite video game?
Mario Goat Cart!