Short jokes
People named Joey are autistic and need to die fatty.
What do you call a group of masturbating cows?
Beef stroganoff.
Why couldn't the kid with Down syndrome play football?
Because he got all the downs.
Why was the pregnant cow mad all the time? It wasn’t in for the moo-d.
Ha! It asked me to submit a joke, but then I realized I'm the joke.
When does it rain money?
When there's a change in the weather.
What did the policeman say to his belly button?
You're under a vest.
What is a panda's favorite cooking implement?
A pan-duh.
Person 1: "Where was Hiroshima?"
Person 2: "In Japan."
Person 1: "No wonder! That's why they never saw it coming."
There was a penguin breathing with his ass. One day, he sat down and he died.
When your grandma says she's rusty but still manages to teach you.
Why do I f*** my mom?
Like father like son. #batabababa
Why did I f*** my dad?
So I could have s€x without my mom finding out. Should I not have done that?
Why is sex with pandas so much fun?
I don't know, it just is. 🐼
Why won't my boyfriend eat my pie? His brother made it.
What comes next in the pattern, ottffs?
S, because it represents numbers going up: one, two, three, four, five, six, seven.
What comes next in the pattern: ottffs?
Why do flamingos sleep with one leg up?
Because if they slept with both legs up, they would fall over!
Did you know that Helen Keller has a swing in her backyard?
Neither did she.
What do you call a violent fish?
A smackeral!