Short jokes
What do you call a chair with a hat?
I don't know; the real question is, why was the chair wearing a hat?
You wonder and you wonder. Grandma said you better go to bed now. Tell your dad and grandpa, and your dad and your mom.
You: What you doing?
I wonder what you’re doing because you’re bad at math, hahahahaha!
"I see, I see." "Oh, do you see?" "I see 1st place looking at me." "Hi, don’t be shy, just say hi." She was shy, she didn’t say hi. Softball cheers.
What do you do when your sister asks you “Why are you sad?”
Reply back with “Because you were born.”
How many emos does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None they just sit in the dark and cry.
Q: What do you do if you bump into a koala?
A: You koalagize to it.
Daddy bear said, "Somebody's been sleeping in my bed!"
Mummy bear said, "It was probably your whore, Linda!"
To master puns, you got to relish them first. That's how I must(ar)d it. Who knows, maybe you will ketchup to my level.
Why do dogs howl?
Because that's the other contraction they know.
What do you call a 18+ animal jam?
Play Wild!
Q: What’s Homer Simpson’s least favorite style of beer?
A: Flanders Red Ale.
Don't adopt people, or else your parents are gonna say you're ACTUALLY adopted, k thx. No jokes anymore, bye.
What did the pond brother say to his lake sister?
"Oasis!" (Oh, hey sis!)
A ginger.
Your dad never needed a van for you.
My ex still misses me... But her aim is getting better every time!
A kid asks for an ice cream. The man says, "Any sauce?" and the kid says, "Na, I got ketchup at home."
Being bullied by an artist? Want them to leave you alone?
www.VincentVanGoghAway.com
What has 4 legs and 1 arm?
A pitbull dog coming back from the kids playground.