Short jokes
Only one of Kenny's girlfriends has ever said he's good in bed.
But she has to. She's his mom.
What do cows call money?
Moola.
Why was Stephen Hawking late to the NASA meeting?
He couldn't get up the kerb.
Your cow is so ugly, it scared the crap out of the toilet!
What do you call a hill with cows on it?
A Moo-ntain.
My friend asks for a turkey burger on 4th of July. I say, "That's Thanksgiving, man!"
What do you do when you made a misteak?
You do some yoga 🧘♀️ and say, "Namaaa steak."
What was the guy with no arms, legs, or a head name?
Matt.
Hi, I am Bill.
You wanna know what's a concept? An orphan being homeschooled.
What's a homeless person's favorite cookie?
Pooreos.
Stephen only died because his wife tripped over the power cord.
How do spiders reach the internet?
Through the World Wide Web!
Why didn’t the bike stand on its own?
It was too tired.
Did you know all Canadians have the same blood type?
They all have blood "eh."
How do you know someone is fucking dumb?
They put jokes that have been used several times already.
Germany: As long as America stays out of the war, we should win.
Japan: *bombing Pearl Harbor* Cowabunga It Is!!
Did you hear about the Boston marathon? 'Cause, well, I heard it was a blast and that it blew everyone away!
Some babies may be delivered via stork, but some bigger babies are gonna need a crane.
You must be depression, because you make me want to kill myself ;)