Short jokes
What do dogs drink? Pupsi.
What soda do dogs drink? Pupsi.
Why is the day you do laundry, cook, clean, iron, and so on called a day off?
The "W" in African stands for water.
What is God's favorite planet?
Saturn because it has a ring around it.
I could never forget my grandfather's last words. "Stop shaking the ladd-"
Uranus is a gassy planet.
What is the most dangerous mountain? Kilimanjaro.
I got some from suggestions, research, etc. etc. Just to illuminate you.
What goes moo? Cow.
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My favorite toast for parties:
May I be in heaven half an hour before the devil knows I'm dead.
Why don't some people like pennies?
Because it's common cents.
What did the chef on the Titanic scream as he tried to finish the dishes? "Oh no, the sink sank!"
Q: What is a skeleton's favorite color?
A: Blue stop signs.
Man 1: You look like Scott Cawthon.
Man 2: I'm gonna put your dick in a Coffin!
Man 3: Me first!
Three Nazis walk into a bar.
Ok, so, a mole goes up to a snail and eats him.
It was a seven course meal if I say so myself.
What was Beethoven's favorite insect?
The bee! :0
My uncle got really badly burned the other day.
They don't fuck around at the crematorium.
How do you think the unthinkable? With an iceberg.