Short jokes
What did one ballsack say to another?
"You stay here, I'll go pee."
Are you choked?
Did you know Stephen Hawking died in a game? The game was Happy Wheels.
Hey Max, what's up? The sky.
I said to my pregnant wife, "Push, darling, come on, push harder, dear!" No, she wasn't giving birth; the bloody car would not start.
Your grandma is pretty old; she'll die soon.
The South.
When your friend moves to Texas and she comes back a cowgirl.
YEEEHAWW!
People need to stop taking life so seriously. After all, no one gets out alive!
Allahu Akbar.
If a person shoots a person about to commit suicide, is it making it less painful, or is it murder?
Toilet paper cried across the road.
- Why is that flight waiting at 30,000 feet height?
- One tire became flat. They are changing it in the middle of the journey.
When I'm bored, I text a random number, "I hid the body... now what?"
What is small, red, and sitting in the corner?
A baby playing with a scalpel.
Poo.
Who's climbing the tree?..... Not Sarah.
Who is in hospital?.... Sarah.
What did the math book say to the other math book?
Wanna hear my problems?
What did the daddy bullet say to his son when he missed the bull and hit something brown and gross?
"That is bull crap!"
What did the father bullet say to the baby bullet when he killed a bull by hitting it in the eye: "Bull's eye!"