How did the Mexican girl get pregnant? Her teacher told her to do his essay.
Short Jokes
What happens when a pun isn’t funny?
It gets PUNished.
Q: What time does an Asian go to the dentist?
A: 2:30
An Asian man goes to the eye doctor.
The doctor says, "It looks like you have a cataract."
The Asian guy says, "No Doc, I drive a Rincoln."
I'm a turd.
Cam likes to peeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee a lot.
When it's been Halloween for a few months, but there's still a body hanging from your neighbor's tree.
Cam was hereeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
Q. What do you give a sick lemon?
A. Lemon-aid.
A guy sits at a bar in a skyscraper restaurant high above the city. He slams a shot of tequila, goes over to the window, and jumps out.
A man enters the bank and says, "Hi, I'm robbing you!" The man was arrested instantly.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Orange who?
Orange glad I didn’t say banana. Hahaha, you’re right, I hate that guy!
What did they call Susan B. Anthony when she was sleeping on the job?
Snoozin' B. Anthony!
How did the orphan die?
Of sadness.
Sign on my attorney's office wall: "You can't have manslaughter without laughter."
I have OCD and ADD, so everything has to be perfect... but not for very long.
What time should you go to bed when it's bedtime?
They didn't have a category for Bald, so I chose the Bald Eagle.
Did you know that bald people have an endless forehead?
They say people are 75% water.
But I'm 100% useless.
What do you call a un-funny rock?
A normal rock.