Short jokes
Dads are boomerangs, I hope.
What do you call a bruised banana?
A school bus full of his kids.
What’s the difference between Jesus and a plank of wood?
A plank of wood can take nails to the extremities without screaming.
What’s the difference between the milk and drugs?
My dad brought the drugs back, not the milk though! 😭
Money and my mom are kinda the same thing; they come and leave easily.
Masochists and sadists are made for each other.
Why does this website have a home page? It's an orphan joke waiting to happen.
STOP THE FRICKING ORPHAN JOKES!!!!!!!!!!!! STOP THEM NOW! STOP THEM NOW NOW NOW N.O.W.
If you kill a killer, the same amount of killers in the room stays the same.
Why did mommy disappear? The dad: Well, when she crossed the road to get to the chicken, she only made it halfway.
What do you call a fish in a bowl? Fish bowl art at art art.
My mom always said garlic powder makes everything better, so I sprinkled some on my divorce papers and my wife's broken leg.
I'm going to draw a picture. A picture with a twist. I'll draw it with a razor blade. I'll draw it on my wrist.
"Never going to give you up." That's not what the orphan's parents said.
I told my friend that if he ever wants 50% off something at a store, just to take me with him and scan my wrist.
I don't like the term "kidnapping." I prefer "surprise adoption."
Kobe Bryant jokes just don't really fly well now.
A guy walks up to a girl. He says, "Hey, you want a poker? I’ve got one."
Where is the wall's favorite place to meet his friends?
Do you know why Daddy never comes back to get the milk? Because he’s the milkman.