Short jokes

Your mama so fat that’s why Hulk gets big.

Yo mama so fat that the Avengers team had to snap five times and say, "Oh my God!"

Why did the frog cross the road to hop to his side, Bih?

I have no problem getting dates online. I’ve also had luck with almonds, cashews, and walnuts.

For our anniversary, I gave my girlfriend a picture of me inside a pistachio.

But that’s just me in a nutshell.

"Don’t look! I saw you peeking through the window."

"Float like a butternut, sting like a bee."

Do you like my a-corn-y jokes?

No pine, no gain!

You pecan do it!

I tried to come up with a funny pun about squirrels, but all my ideas were nuts.

You must be rich! You've got all the cashews.

Your secret is safe with me. I walnut tell a soul.

I love almond milk. It’s unlike any udder milk.

I had fresh coconut the last time I went to Hawaii. It’s a tough nut to crack.

I’d tell you a secret about peanut butter, but you might spread it.

A friend asked what an acorn is.

I said, “In a nutshell, it’s an oak tree.”

I want an almond-flavored biscuit.

I have a pun, but I will nut tell you!

The peanut gained confidence and finally came out of its shell.