Short jokes

Why are there only 363 days in an orphan's calendar?

They don’t have fathers or Mother’s Day.

I'm so skinny, I could use floss as a noose.

How do you know your acne is getting out of hand? The blind start reading your face.

Why are so many Americans stupid? Because they shoot the ones that go to school.

Before Jane, was Tarzan clapping gorilla cheeks?

What does the SpongeBob intro and a pedo have in common?

Are you ready, kids?🤣

New Gen iPhones are designed for orphans, because they don’t need a home button.

I got caught fucking a dead body by my family. RIP grandma.

What’s the worst thing about being a pedophile?

Fitting it in.

Mpreg is hot af.

I love jacking off to mpreg.

"Suicide is the 10th leading cause of death"?

Maybe in infidel America but.... it is #1 in the Glorious Iran.

🇮🇷🇮🇷🇮🇷🇮🇷

How did Michael Jackson die?

Because he danced like a zombie!

My mom said that being straight is good, but if you're straight, how do you walk? So I decided to be gay.

Go fuck yourself, cause I doubt anyone else will. 💅

What was Helen Keller's favorite game when she was a kid?

I spy.

There were two twins, and they were both very tall.

The next thing they knew, they were on the floor, and there were planes up their asses.

Which way do gay men walk?

One Direction.

What's the difference between me and my pencil sharpeners? Nothing, we're both broken.

My ceiling fan isn't the only thing that's going to be hanging tonight.

What's the difference between my arm and my stomach? My stomach isn't ripped.