Short jokes
If you think the guy calling you fat is offensive,
Try salad 🥗.
What’s 8 inches and women scream when they see it?
A puppy, you dirty monkey!
I can do a very good Michael Jackson impersonation. I just need a kid who can keep a secret.
I fucked your mom, oh wait, you don't have one.
Why does the cannibal village not exist anymore?
They all ate each other.
The Stigg and his fake ass life.
How many skinheads does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
10; 1 to do it and 9 to back him up.
Don't believe what your school bully tells you.
Always take it with a grain of assault.
Bully: Hey virgin!
Victim: I'm not a virgin, just ask your sister.
Bully: I don't have a sister, dumbass.
Victim: Just wait nine months.
I went to a butcher house with my little cousin and saw a baby pig and told her, "Look, it's Pepa Pig!"
She started crying.
What do you call a fake speedrunner?
Dream.
What do you call a Barbie doll that’s wearing scrubs?
A plastic surgeon. 😷
A book went to the doctor’s office and said: “Doctor, doctor, I’ve got thesaurus throat ever.”
Yo mama so stupid that she sat on the TV and watched the couch.
We are in a matrix, wake up.
What do you call a pickle sandwich?
A Big Mac!
Nuns be like: Can I spread the word, but check for you?
I'm going to bomb a little child (I'm an USA bomber).
America is filled with MAYO MONKEYS (you could make a mayo sandwich!).
I gotta do terrorist :)
Maybe your butt good? Maybe bad... I'M GOING TO LAUGH!